Welcoming Chandler therapy office with comfortable sofa seating, warm lighting, teal walls, and a private counseling space designed for comfort and conversation.

What is Counseling Like?

For many, the idea of beginning counseling can feel daunting. Counseling has been shown in pop culture and spoken of in society as many things. And counseling can indeed look different in many ways, but maybe not how you’re imagining. Let’s break it down.

“Therapy” vs “Counseling”

First off, you’ll find me using the terms therapy and counseling interchangeably because the words are interchangeable. Some prefer one term over the other, some think one sounds like it is appropriate in different contexts than the other, but they’re the same thing. Therefore, “therapists” and “counselors” are also the same.

While on this topic, it is worth noting that “counseling” and “therapy” are not interchangeable with “psychiatry”. Therefore, “psychiatrists” are not the same as “counselors” and “therapists”.

Finding the Right Counselor

One of the hardest parts can be the beginning: finding the right counselor for you.

This is an important step as the therapeutic alliance, the strength of the relationship between a therapist and client is believed to be one of the most important predictors of success in therapy. You might find yourself browsing Psychology Today or Google looking for a therapist in your area and finding yourself drawn to some therapists more than others. Some profiles blend together, while one or two stand out for reasons you can’t fully explain.

It’s important you focus on which therapists you are drawn to. Sometimes it’s the way someone writes. Sometimes it’s their personality. Sometimes it’s just a gut feeling that this person feels easier to talk to.

This doesn’t guarantee it will be the perfect fit, but if someone’s profile makes you feel a little more at ease, a little more understood, or a little more willing to open up, they’re probably worth exploring further.

What Happens When You Reach Out?

Once you have found a counselor you feel drawn to, you have the opportunity to learn a little more about them and their approach to counseling. Many counselors will offer a free consultation as an opportunity to get to know them better. Consultations are not counseling, they are an introduction.

During a consultation you would not generally dive deep into your concerns; there is no expectation that you would share any highly sensitive information.

This is your opportunity to ask the counselor about themself and what you could expect in counseling with them. Some examples of questions you might consider asking:

  • I’m new to counseling. Is counseling just talking about feelings?

  • I’m not sure what to expect from counseling. Could you still help?

  • I’m not typically good at discussing my feelings. How can I even do counseling?

  • What happens if it becomes too difficult or I feel too nervous in the middle of a session?

  • What is your counseling style like?

  • What kinds of clients do you usually work with?

  • What does the first session usually look like? What happens after the first session?

  • How do we know counseling is helping?

  • Do you offer in-person sessions, telehealth sessions, or both?

  • What are your fees? How much would you expect counseling to cost me overall?

  • How does scheduling work?

These are just a few of the plenty of types of questions counselors will expect to answer during the initial consultation call. You’ll probably also discuss office policies, scheduling - the basic stuff.

Welcoming Chandler counseling office interior with teal walls, cozy seating, warm lighting, wood furniture, and a professional private therapy setting.

What is the First Session Like?

The first session or the intake session is usually pretty straightforward. It’s an opportunity to build rapport (Therapeutic Alliance!) and tell your story. Your counselor will want to know important information such as what brings you to counseling, what you’d like to change in your life, what your goals for counseling are, and so forth.

For many, the intake session may seem a little overwhelming. You might enter the session feeling pretty nervous, emotionally elevated, guarded, anxious. However, oftentimes this session will run smoothly. Many are going to leave the first session thinking “That wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be!”

The first session is simply the first step on your journey to progress.

What Does Counseling Look Like Over Time?

After that first session, counseling can go a number of different directions. Your counselor’s approach to counseling will dictate those next sessions. Some counselors are going to follow a more structured approach to your work together, while others will seem like they are working with little structure.

During these sessions you can expect conversations focused on understanding what’s happening, making meaningful changes, and supporting those changes and building momentum.  Your therapist might help you with:

  • Setting goals and creating a structured plan to achieve them

  • Developing and practicing coping skills

  • Identifying and understanding patterns

  • Reducing anxiety and stress

  • Improving your relationships

  • Changing habits

What Does Counseling Looks Like with Me?

For example, in sessions with me, we will work collaboratively to set structured goals in the first sessions based on the specific challenges you face. This helps create the foundation for our work together.

A treatment plan is the roadmap which guides your time in counseling. It helps us stay focused, give direction, track progress and plan our approach. Interventions include tools, skills and strategies such as:

  • Identifying patterns

  • Identifying triggers

  • Developing relaxation techniques

  • Challenging thoughts

  • Reframing thoughts

  • Setting boundaries

In counseling we use interventions to work towards objectives, smaller steps that support achieving your bigger goals. Simple examples of objectives include:

  • Recognize recurring thoughts, behaviors, or relationship patterns that contribute to stress

  • Identify common situations or stressors that increase anxiety or emotional distress

  • Practice healthy strategies to calm the mind and body during stress

  • Notice and question thoughts that increase anxiety, shame, or self-doubt

  • Develop more balanced and helpful ways of thinking about challenges

  • Learn to communicate limits, needs, and expectations in a healthy way

I will collaborate with you to identify what will be most effective for you. Counseling is not one-size-fits-all. Together, we will create a plan that is personalized, realistic and designed to challenge you while still being attainable.

Once we begin, the process may take different turns, but the goal remains the same - forward progress.